It is a known fact that men, and in some cases women, have used “catcalling” to gain the attention of the opposite sex.
It has become so common that some people have accepted it as a respectful way to court their counterparts. The truth of the matter is that this approach has taken a turn for the worst and has caused some of our nation’s women and men to look at catcalling as a form of harassment and verbal abuse.
Hey there “Sweetie.” In most cases I think to myself, my name is not “Sweetie!” as I politely smile and walk away. I have heard this obnoxious, dry pickup line on so many occasions.
I personally have a sense of humor with the ability to acknowledge a man’s off brand approach. I view these oh-so-common and typical situations as yet another “weirdo” that obviously hasn’t learned how to properly approach a lady.
Although I am able to easily brush off sexual comments regarding my physique and sex appeal, other women are not. I have not encountered a situation where I was abused, necessarily harassed, or felt like I was in danger.
The scary truth is that it does happen to many women all over the country. The outrage of catcalling and the cry out for help has become so severe that people across the nation have come together to form groups to help stop this form of harassment. “Hey mamasita,” “Hey Sexy,” “How much,” “Hey Shorty” and “Ugly Dyke” are all sayings that have caused international attention.
Sexually explicit comments, sexist remarks, homophobic slurs, groping, leering, stalking, flashing and assault. These very sensitive topics have become the focus of individuals internationally to create awareness around these unacceptable and in some cases reprehensible behaviors between genders.
Just this year, more than  25 countries  took part in International Anti-Street Harassment Week 2014. “Most women and some men will face gender-based street harassment by strangers in their life. Street harassment limits people’s mobility and access to public spaces. It is a form of gender violence and it’s a human rights violation. It needs to stop,” according to the website www.stopstreetharassment.org. This informative site provides a very logical and sensitive approach to these subjects. Women and men alike are able to unite by sharing their stories of fear, embarrassment, and desire for respect with others.
In many situations there are women who feel violated by some of the comments they hear, although some women feed off of the attention from the opposite sex, no matter what form it comes in.
I have witnessed the disheartened look on some of my friends’ faces when their outfits or red lipstick didn’t draw the attention that they expected from the gentlemen at the bar. It’s a known fact that a revealing outfit unfortunately can initiate a conflicting conversation.
On one hand women are annoyed and offended by the remarks made by men, yet stray from the rules of standards and decency by wearing clothing that draws attention.
In some cases these comments aren’t deemed necessary or warranted but as a woman you have to acknowledge the facts. Life is one big stereotype! We fight for equality and recite those silly sayings; “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.” Fact of the matter is it’s not. We live in a world of double standards and small knit communities where you have to always be conscious, and understand that those daisy dukes and halter tops you wear just might play a part in some of the unwarranted yet self explanatory “action” you receive.
I am 5’1”, caramel skin, big brown almond-shaped walnut colored eyes, full lips with some pretty decent curves inherited from my mother and grandmother. I am fully aware that no matter what I wear, from jeans to yoga pants, I cannot hide what I have been “given.”
Some women call it “thirsty” when a man in most cases is simply trying to receive the attention of a woman.
If the variables of the night include a black mini skirt, stiletto pumps and a gentleman full of alcohol, don’t be surprised if he finds you attractive and approaches you. Yes, some men are way too aggressive and it appears they have forgotten what it tastes like to have their mouths washed out with soap. In some cases men just don’t have “game,” their approach is lame and annoying, and because it’s so obnoxious it can easily be confused with harasment.
I am not oblivious to the fact that catcalling and some of the other topics mentioned earlier in this article, such as sexist remarks and homophobic slurs, should not be ignored or taken lightly. Some situations are severe and lead to rape cases, missing men and women, sexual and physical abuse.
We have to always be aware of our surroundings and try our best not to put ourselves in predicaments where the odds are stacked against us. It’s like crossing the street, you have to be careful and look both ways and proceed with caution. Understand some common rules of courting and know that if you’re gorgeous, pretty, or sexy men are going to try and approach you.
The best advice I can give is to laugh when it’s warranted, say thank you if you’re flattered, and smile to avoid conflict even if you might be offended. Be mindful of your environment and if for any reasons you feel unsafe or uncomfortable, seek help or counsel immediately.